Being a mum, we wouldn’t swap it, BUT sometimes we think, “It can be both the best and worst of times.”
And 2020 itself has been challenging. Whether in lockdown, home schooling, juggling work in person or from home. Perhaps job losses have impacted you, and yet we are still keeping the plates in the air. As mums, everyone is looking to us to make things OK, right?
It is OK to feel like it’s challenging.
That is probably one of the first things that is a challenge as mums, to permit ourselves to feel all our emotions without guilt. While we can achieve super-human feats, we still fundamentally are humans (fabulous humans!).
Did you know most research shows over 90% of mums feel guilt, and it can lead to serious health repercussions?
Guilt and pushing away those feelings can lead to:
- Stress
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Memory Issues
- Stopping us from finding joy
And it is potentially causing significantly more challenges. But acknowledging and overcoming guilt can benefit your life. It can enable you to:
- Take action
- Build resilience
- Create more joy
- Be present
- Live your best life
Positives that we all deserve in life.
However, another challenge linked to guilt is taking care of ourselves so we can take care of everyone else. The thought alone can be tiring and trigger guilt.
It is so essential to understand the airline adage ‘put your mask on first before helping children and others’.
What makes it hard practically is people think self-care = self-indulgent (mindset). They envisage it has to be a big thing – going for a massage, a trip away to a wine region with your tribe (ahh bliss).
BUT
The reality is self-care is the opposite of self-indulgence and doesn’t need to be big, grand, and every so often.
It can be simple as:
- Waking up before everyone else and enjoying your morning routine
- Learning to say NO without guilt
- Setting boundaries
- Taking a moment just to sit and be. Even if craziness is going on around the house, escape. No one will be in danger
- Having an easy dinner, could be take-away, going out or having toast – whatever suits you
- Changing up your routine just because you can, and it is good for you
- Asking for help
- Permitting yourself… for what? For whatever you want or need
- Understanding your strengths and being proud of them
Importantly do all of these without GUILT.
The next step is to take on the self-care challenge by doing something simple and personal for yourself and doing it now.
Then turn it into a habit by doing it tomorrow, the day after and so on. Choose things from smaller to bigger and embrace growth and opportunities they bring.
That bigger could be the weekend away, joining a gym (with no guilt, knowing you deserve to look after yourself) or perhaps engaging a coach to help you clarify what you want to change in life and more importantly why you want it.
What is the one thing you will do for yourself today?
